Metallica - "Loads Of Crap, Part 1 & 2"

Between 1991 and 1996, Metallica competed with Guns N' Roses as the biggest band in the land (while Pearl Jam and Nirvana were just climbing to the top). Metallica had released their incredibly successful self-titled disc entitled "Metallica" (and referred to here as the "Black" album to avoid confusion) that, while faithful followers did not like the music because it veered from their previous "thrash" stylings, won over millions of new fans, with melodic and/or groove-based, simpler songs like "Enter Sandman", "The Unforgiven", and "Sad But True", that would not contain numerous riffs and tempos, but stay within a common theme. The running punchline when the faithful followers said Metallica "sold out", the band would reply "every night". To date, the album has gone 16x platinum in the United States, but much like their future (albeit ill-fated) tourmates, Guns N' Roses (who were promoting their post-"Appetite For Destruction" albums, "Use Your Illusions I & II"), they found that following such a mammoth release was not only a gargantuan task, but it seemed that both bands wrote (and recorded) so much material that they released it all to see what would stick.

Metallica followed up this album with their dual batch of songs, writing the material for "Load" (released in 1996) and "Re-Load"(released in 1997) simultaneously, while the basic tracks for "Re-Load" were finished at the same time as "Load", under the supervision of famed producer, Bob Rock (Bon Jovi, The Cult, Motley Crue, and more). This albums continued to a more bluesy side of the band that further distanced fans who were there from the beginning, calling the album "Load Of Sh!t", while, in the attempt to appear more artsy, left newer fans wondering if this was what they were buying into. With "Load" going platinum 5 times in the US, and "Re-Load" reaching that status 4 times, it would be hard for almost any other band to call these albums a commercial failure, but music industry expectations being so high following the "Black" album, they were exactly that. Fans (partially unjustifiably and unfairly) dismissed much of the music due to the band's new look featuring newly shorn hair styles, cigars, suits, eyeliner, and blood stained semen album covers.

With this in mind (like I wrote previously with Guns N' Roses "Use Your Illusions"), I decided to take it upon myself to create one album out of both using the same previous parameters and rules, while maintaining certain trademarks of the band's sound (such as their identifiable groove, their melodic stylings, and refined harshness):

• I can use any demos found from the time of the release of the "Black" album (wasn't any that I found).
• Any recordings later found on the covers collection Metallica released later on "Garage, Inc." that was recorded during this time (although I did not add any due to Metallica never including a cover on the initial release of any album, and before you mention it, "Kill 'Em All" did not have "Am I Evil?" or "Blitzkreig", as they were added when Elektra reissued the album after signing the band).
• Since "Load" clocked in at 78 minutes and 58 seconds, while "Re-Load" came in at 76 minutes, I split the difference with a time cap of 77 minutes and 30 seconds.
• While CDs were the choice of format at this time, music was still being released on cassette and, on a smaller scale, LPs, I created with list with the idea of two sides.
• While a song may have been released as a single, that merit alone did not mean automatic inclusion.
• I picked songs with no regard making the same amount of songs from each release, but to create one complete release regardless of the collection in which it previously came.

I created a playlist on the free streaming site Spotify if you would like to listen as I give my choices:

1. Fuel (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - I kick off the first with could possibly be the most straight forward song in this collection, which is what the band also chose to do on "Re-Load". This widely-used selection in the racing circuit was an easy choice for its inclusion.
2. Ain't My Bitch (Hetfield, Ulrich) - This track, which was the opening song on "Load", completed for the spot on this collection as well. It was selected second to carry the theme that Metallica were in a "take no prisoners" approach. Carrying the band characteristic groove, this fan favorite was a live staple during this period.
3. King Nothing (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - I had always heard the band got weary of playing "Enter Sandman" during any televised appearance, and this song from "Load" was released as a single to quell that request from programmers. I would chose this song as the first single due to its' familiar sound and arrangement to "Enter Sandman", which includes an homage to the "Black" album hit at the end of the song.
4. Slither (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - Carrying their signature groove, this song stays in the initial feel of the album in terms of heaviness. Aptly titled due to its snake-like charm, the band locks in collectively to create a squirmy feeling.
5. Hero Of The Day (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - Starting out displaying Metallica's melodic side, this track turns into a full on thrash number towards the end, allowing James Hetfield to show is melodic voice and signature growl within one track.
6. 2 x 4 (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - Feeling the need to re-establish the classic Metallica swagger with a bluesy edge, this song closes out the first side. With ample groove, this song signs off the side with a monstrous groove.
7. Better Than You (Hetfield, Ulrich) - This grammy winning number is the punch in the teeth the second set needs to kick off. Signatory with Hetfield's fiery vocal lines and crushing guitar lines, this song's theme of contentment carries a personal anger that has carried through the collection thus far.
8.  Bad Seed (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - This slow churning tune features a mammoth groove while James Hetfield spits lyrics about forcing someone to come to terms with honesty. Bassist Jason Newsted leads this rhythm with a surprising running bassline during the solo while supplying a solid bottom end for the rest of the track.
9. Until It Sleeps (Hetfield, Ulrich) - With familiarity in sound to the "Black" album's "The Unforgiven", this is this collection's second foray into being a predominately melodic track. With subtle instrumentation in the verses, the song carries into the pre-chorus and chorus with a heavier fare, creating a nice balance of peaks and valleys.
10. Devil's Dance (Hetfield, Ulrich) - Armed with a sinister groove, this song displays Hetfield's  darker side lyrically. Reminiscent lyrically of being the story from the point of view of the snake in the story of Adam and Eve in the book of Genesis of The Bible, this song locks in stylistically feeling tempted.
11. Cure (Hetfield, Ulrich) - With "Load" and "Re-Load" offering their fair share of more blues-based numbers (by the band's standards), I decided to include this track. With a Danzig-like verse, the pre-chorus and chorus that would waver the crowd live, had it been played in that capacity. Tragically overlooked.
12. Wasting My Hate (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - Closing this collection with Metallica's tradition of a more upbeat rhythm, although not as fast as some of the songs in this position on previous releases. This song offers a soundtrack to angst that would make a part of any workout playlist.

This collection is 12 tracks long clocking in around 58 minutes, with 7 songs from "Load", and 5 from "Re-Load".

There were some notable songs not chosen for this collection that were singles:

• Mama Said (Hetfield, Ulrich) - This country-flavored song didn't fit this collection, nor would I say it even fit its inclusion on "Load". Save it for the solo album, James.
• The Memory Remains (Hetfield, Ulrich) - Spotlighting folk singer Marianne Faithfull, this song, while fitting their adventurous stylings upon release, did not fit in what I would consider a more cohesive gathering of music. May have used it for a soundtrack somewhere, however.
• The Unforgiven II (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) - One "The Unforgiven" song was enough. It should've died there, instead of being flogged like a dead horse. I would not have objected if they wanted to create a unique EP consisting all three movements of the similarly titled themes, but the song has no place here in my opinion.

On this collection, these would be the singles:

• King Nothing
• Bad Seed
• Until It Seems
• Hero Of The Day
• Fuel

By trimming what many consider the fat from "Load" and "Re-Load", I feel a release like this would've followed where the "Black" album left off, with a possibility that it could've saved the band from the misguided foray into the misguided attempt to be trendy with the release of "St. Anger". 

I'm curious what you think. What did I miss? Feel free to comment and critique here or my social media pages.

Until we meet again...

New Illusion - Revisiting Guns N' Roses Use Your Illusion Releases

After setting the world of music on fire with their infectious debut, Appetite For Destruction, in 1987, Guns N' Roses released of the most ambitious collections ever in the form of Use Your Illusion I & II in 1991. The collections, which were two separate releases as opposed to a double album, had a combined 30 songs clocking in at 2 hours, 31 minutes, and 48 seconds. With these albums, as one collective appeared to this listener to be missing a common theme and sounded disjointed. As the band was trying to sonically grow, some songs sounded self-indulgent, while others seemed to be "phoning it in" to appease those who wanted more of the Appetite-era fare. This is where I come in.

Upon listening, I took it upon myself to attempt to make the Illusion a single cohesive release, one that may be more fitting to following up their debut and their EP, GNR Lies. I did not think the single release of this album, done to get some of these songs into chain department store afraid to carrying the two albums due to language, was a fitting barometer of the music that represented the band. Another issue with these releases were there were songs in added to fill space. Many bands have done this over time, but with GNR having such credibility of musical quality, I have decided to remove these.

The lineup in the band had changed over the course of four years as well. While adding keyboard player, Dizzy Reed, the band replaced drummer Steven Adler with Matt Sorum, formerly of The Cult, due to Alder's excessive substance abuse (which must've been substantial considering this band was known for their excesses). While Matt is technically a fantastic drummer, Steven had a pulse that drove AFD, and Sorum's contributions often came off as "typical". As a hired member of the band, I can surmise he was probably not given much leeway to make suggestions, so this isn't to besmirch his additions.

This is what many of the grooves sounded like to me.

While researching my previous GNR post, I found a few songs that made it to this collection that were written before AFD. I decided in doing this, I had to set some ground rules to help with making this a comprehensive set.

• Studio recording of the GNR Lies live songs would be allowed here due to never being released in that form.
• Any cover, including anything on The Spaghetti Incident?, would be permitted, as I believe we can safely assume the band played many of these in rehearsals even during this time, and were recorded during these studio sessions.
• Since both albums clocked in at 75 minutes, I set that as my hard time limit for how long this could be so that I stay in the parameters of the physical releases. 
• The track order was done with the idea of "two sides", as these albums have been released on cassette and LP.
• Just because a song was released as a single did not mean it had to be included as it just didn't fit my vision for this.
• I did not pick songs to placate any egos, but only pick the best material available. If it fits, it sticks.

In making this, I also planned on marketing an EP to be released a short time after containing a few songs missing in the collection, as many bands at the time (including GNR) would hold out certain tracks for future releases and soundtrack releases (which I did not hold songs for, but there were enough leftover for such).

Here is the track-by-track rundown, and you can listen along while you read:

1. "Back Off Bitch" (Rose, Tobias) - The leadoff track was written leading up to AFD, and sets the tone for this ensemble, picking up where AFD left off. Equipped with a signature Slash lead, killer riff, and the "take no prisoners" style GNR fans expect, this was an easy choice.
2. "Pretty Tied Up" (Stradlin) - Loaded with a Rolling Stones-esque swagger, this tune allows for the expansion of taste later in the assembly. The lyrics are reak of Hollywood streets, and Duff's great running bass lines, it also shows the band didn't venture too far from what fans would expect.
3. "You Could Be Mine" (Rose, Stradlin) - Also written during the AFD demo sessions, the original lead off single featured for the release of the movie "Terminator 2". I would also pick it as the lead off single, as it is the first taste for fans to know what to expect.
4. "Don't Damn Me" (Rose, Slash, Lank) - This often forgotten tune from UYI I keeps the ball rolling along with an infusion of unadulterated rock.
5. "Perfect Crime" (Rose, Slash, Stradlin) - This high speed rocker sets up as an apex on the first side that allows the next two songs to bring you down leading into side two.
6. "Hair Of The Dog" (McCafferty, Agnew, Charlton, Sweet) - GNR released their take on this Nazereth classic on TSI?, and I have always found this to be the perfect cover song for the band, as the musical style and vocals were as if the band wrote it themselves.
7. "Civil War" (Rose, Slash, McKagan) - As the only song including drums by Steven Adler, this song slides into the "Paradise City" position that was set on AFD. This mature song shows the band in branching out and is a needed change of pace for the songs before it on side one, closing out the side.
8. "November Rain" (Rose) - The first ballad on this release, this song was also originally a single and I see no reason why it shouldn't be here as well. Eloquent piano, soaring guitar leads, and poignant lyrics show a softer side first displayed by "Sweet Child O' Mine" from AFD and "Patience" from GNR Lies. 
9. "Double Talkin' Jive" (Stradlin) - Strapped with an undeniable groove, this song, sung by Izzy, gives a take back into reality into the GNR world. The only issue I would point out is to trim out the extended spanish-flavored acoustic lead by Slash in the end. Albeit tasteful, it is unnecessary here, as the gist of the song covers what needs to be done.
10. "The Garden" (Rose, Arkeen, James) - Equipped with a guest vocal from the legendary Alice Cooper, I also chose this song as another step in allowing the band to spread their wings.
11. "Dust N' Bones" (Slash, Stradlin. McKagan) - While Izzy takes lead on this song, this song is steeped in a very classic rock variety. 
12. "Don't Cry (Alt. Lyrics)" (Rose, Stradlin) - Originally a single, this song features Shannon Hoon of the band Blind Melon on backing vocals. I chose the "alternate lyric" version found on UYI II, as I have plans for the other version later in the blog.
13. "Locomotive" (Rose, Slash) - To me, this is the hidden gem on the album, with a relentless guitar riff played by Slash. Clocking in at 8:42, this is the perfect ending to the compilation.

The singles:

• "You Could Be Mine"
• "Don't Cry"
• "November Rain"
• "Hair Of The Dog"
• "Pretty Tied Up"

This collection has 13 songs and comes in at around 71 minutes.

There have been websites that have written about doing the same as I have (1, 2, & 3)but other than searching them out, I tried to not study them so so that they don't influence my decision. 

As I stated before, some songs were reserved for later, and during the cycle for this album, there was a trilogy of videos that fans loved as the stories intertwined while allowing the band a great deal of artistic freedom. I will use these three and another track as a video EP to be sold between releases for the next album. The track listing is:

1. "Don't Cry (Original)" (Rose, Stradlin)
2. "November Rain" (Rose)
3. "Estranged" (Rose)
4. "My World" (Rose)

There are other personal or fan favorites I left off of this collection such as "Coma", "Yesterdays", the cover songs, among others. These songs can be used for soundtracks or future CD releases.

So there you have it. This is how I would rework the Use Your Illusion albums into what I deem as a strong follow up to the mammoth Appetite For Destruction, which is a daunting task. I have always heard "you have your whole life to write your first album, and six months to write your second", which very true here.

If you get a chance, and have Spotify (it's free), give this a listen and let me know what you think.

I have added a demo here as a bonus song that I found during my research. Note that it has strong language, but I found it to be a riot.

Until we meet again...

30 YEARS OF DESTRUCTION: RECONSTRUCTING APPETITE

I'm going into this writing knowing there is very little I am going to say that hasn't already been said. "Appetite For Destruction" is considered by many to be the greatest debut album of all time, and sales of the album are a great indication of this fact. It seems in the western civilization that more people like something off of this album more than those who don't like any of it. The first time I heard it, I didn't like it at all.

As a 15-year-old know-it-all in 1987 (I'm old now), and loved hard rock music. I was really into Ozzy Osbourne, Stryper, Motley Crue, and Poison. I had just recently discovered the excellence that was the debut album by Faster Pussycat, a very raw and abrasive album full of hooks.

Hanging out for the day at my girlfriend's house to listen to music, which was (believe it or not) very sweet and innocent, she had a new cassette for me to check out. She really loved Appetite, and thought I would love it too. In my advanced wisdom, music was a competition and confrontational. There was no way in my mind I could take the album for what it was, and I was too busy comparing it to other albums than to actually realize what I was listening to. With sales as an indicator, I was right for the better part of the year. Label support seemed to agree with me.

We were all really fucking wrong

Let's make this very clear before I go much farther: grunge did not kill 80's metal; this album did. This set the bar that other albums of the genre could not reach for whatever reason, and even the band could not follow up with as much quality and execution this album had. The songwriting was not just songs, but were "crafted". Performance wise, everyone was on point, and there has been very little I recall of an entire album that consisted of attitude from beginning to end. When you listen to this album, you fucking know right where these guys are coming from. A few albums have come close, but no album since can truly touch this opus. You can literally smell the smudge, grime, cigarettes, leather, and whiskey when you listen to it.

Brought together by a couple of different Los Angeles bands, vocalist W. Axl Rose, guitarist Izzy Stradlin, and bassist Duff McKagan added guitarist Slash and drummer Steven Adler (whom Duff had played with before) a group that was as many parts productive as they were destructive. The band was a ticking time bomb of caricatures of personalities fueled by the excesses only the "City Of Angels" could afford for the young, misfit band.

The world was their oyster and they were hellbent to claim it.

From the opening strains of "Welcome To The Jungle" to the sex-crazed moans in "Rocket Queen", this collection recalls times of love, abuse, hope, abandonment, happiness, and sadness. It is an audio roller coaster that takes you through a portrait of their life that lacks in any filler (ironically, lead guitarist Slash thought "Sweet Child O' Mine" was just a filler song when they first wrote it, and it was a HUGE hit, and ultimately saved the album from disappearing with making a very minimal mark). The overall sequence of these songs flow in a way that you are on an alcohol-fueled journey that they are escorting you on.

The songs are chock full of soaring vocals, melodic yet scorching solos, tight rhythms, immaculate hooks, hard-hitting riffs, and transitions within the songs (that are often ignored) that transcends many genre labels and crosses barriers that have very rarely been crossed before or since its release.Almost everyone can connect to something in this collection. My personal favorites have always been "Paradise City", "Rocket Queen", "Out Ta Get Me", and "My Michelle", which I have connected to each in one way or another. Ask someone else their four favorites on this album, and they will differ (I would like to see yours in the comments below) for various reasons.

(Instead of doing a track-by-track critique which has been overdone numerous times, I decided I will do a review of the songs that didn't make the album, and possibilities why they didn't make the album).

To follow this up, the band released a half-live, half-acoustic EP entitled "GNR Lies", then a very ambitious two album collection (which many think should have just been one sole release) called "Use Your Illusions I & II", (along with later released covers album "The Spaghetti Incident?", the live collection "Live Era 87-93", and a release in which Axl Rose was the only sole member "Chinese Democracy", including solo releases and compilations) yet none came close to reaching the landmark proportions this album hit.

Numerous lineup changes along the way has not helped their recreation causes either, as part of what made this work was that the energy the band had together was also what would rip them apart. The drummer, Steven Adler, was the first to go due to his addictions. The rigors of touring, along with the hedonistic circus of their lifestyles, made newly sober guitarist Izzy Stradlin the next to depart. After gaining control of the primary trademarks of the band and completing the Illusions tour, Axl Rose fired the remaining original members, Slash and Duff McKagan, with rumors that the material they were bringing to the next CD not as Axl envisioned them to be.

Only Metallica's self-titled CD, Led Zeppelin's "IV", and AC/DC's "Back In Black" have sold more than "Appetite For Destruction" in the genre of hard rock, and none of these releases were debuts, making this auspicious collection a "once in a lifetime" collaboration.

"You're in the jungle, baby
You're gonna die!"

In doing my due diligence in researching and revisiting this album (I can't trust everything to memory), I wanted to find songs that were considered for AFD, and thought it would be fun to speculate as to why they were not included, with my only knowledge being my opinion and what I had read in interviews by those in the GNR circle at the time. They could almost make a second album themselves.

November Rain -

Later released on Use Your Illusion I, this is a sweeping tale of the pendulum that is relationships soared into many high school proms when it was released, and housewives everywhere claimed their love and obsession to Axl Rose once viewing the video. The song, however, didn't fit the bite that AFD delivered, with "Sweet Child O' Mine" and "Think About You" being considered the albums ballads, this piano-tinged epic does not fit the overall vibe.

Shadow Of Your Love -

Having been written prior to Slash and Adler's joining of the group, Axl and Izzy (along with future member of Chinese Democracy-era GNR, Paul Tobias) wrote this song for their band Hollywood Rose, which featured Tracii Guns of LA Guns fame on lead guitar. This "four-on-the-floor" rocker was pretty straight forward, which didn't include many of the trademark transitions AFD displayed. Also, this song's energy was not something that would have helped the collective of songs released and came acrossed written as very basic. Hear for yourself:

It Tastes Good, Don't It -

This song was a challenge to Axl vocally, this rap-infused (!) rocker has the kind of groove that would've easily fit AFD, but without a catchy chorus or hook, along with the juvenile lyrics, it's exclusion was written on first listen. Musically, I wish the song would've been given proper attention as the rhythm hits all the right places:

Goodnight Tonight -

Apparently written to be their set closer, that seems to be the only destiny this song possessed. A very standard fare which featured the title repeated with very little in the way of lyrics. This is just the band having a good time on stage and ending with a crescendo:

Move To The City -

GNR Lies live side featured two original songs that recorded in the studio (along with two covers) that they later added crowd noise to sound as if the band was playing a performance. This songs a very GNR-type groove and riff, and may have fit very well on AFD, but the question would've been where, and while "Paradise City" had synthesizers, the horns on this song would've most likely stood out like a fart in church.

You Could Be Mine - 

While lyrics for this song were used for the linear notes for AFD, this song was the leadoff single for the Use Your Illusions (next to the last song on II) and was used to promote the movie Terminator 2, which starred Arnold Schwarzenegger. This was the very first taste of what GNR was going to earnestly follow up with AFD. I'm speculating this was just a song that was not finished to a point they were happy with or the performance was a bit off and not worth then trouble at the time. It also seems fitting that it was not included as the song seems a bit "slicker" then the others which could've made the overall album seem "gimmicky". Good luck finding the demo played on, however.

Reckless Life -

Another song the pre-GNR band Hollywood Rose used that was written by the band along with sometimes co-writer and former Hollywood Rose bandmate Chris Webber, who helped write AFD's "Anything Goes", along with "Move To The City", and "Shadow Of Your Love". This tune, also from GNR Lies given the "live" treatment, is a blues based super charged rocker that features the band's signature transitions and catchy chorus. I assume the reason for its exclusion was not needing a song that fast and it wasn't as strong as some of the options.

Back Off Bitch -

Originally released (but written well before) its debut as the 5th track on Use Your Illusion I, this song's demo version is in its infant stages and you can hear what direction they were headed towards, but just wasn't there at the time (I'm pretty sure the hand clapping wouldn't have fit on AFD).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAWBQZTksUI

Don't Cry -

Released on both versions (with different lyrics) of Use Your Illusions, many are shocked to find out this huge single was written and demoed for AFD. Leaving this song out was done for much the same reasons as "November Rain" in that the album did not need another ballad. Also, record companies, in planning for a second album in advance, will have a band hold back a few songs to earmark as future releases so the band does not lose what it had from releases before. I feel this was one of those songs.

Ain't Goin' Down -

I feel this song could've been the most likely used for AFD had the chorus been a bit stronger. To be honest, I'm a bit surprised this song was never released anywhere as it fits with the overall feel of AFD. Also, this song's studio demo features what may have Axl's first use of his very bassy vocal, used in the backups. The solo breakdown does seem a bit reminiscent of the breakdown in "Think About You", which may have been the reason for it to be omitted. Check out this hidden gem for yourself:

 

The covers -

GNR demoed several songs written by other artists. Without going into details into each one, AFD did not need a cover to take away from the other songs on the LP. I will list them before and feel free to search them out yourself.

• "Jumpin' Jack Flash"
• "Knockin' On Heavens Door"
• "Mama Kin"
• "Nice Boys"
• "Heartbreak Hotel"
• "Whole Lotta Rosie"

Well, there you have it: my take on what may be the greatest debut album in hard rock history. I am curious what some of you think, so feel free to comment, share, etc.

Until we meet again...

Time travel to 2009

So I wrote this 8 years ago about one of my favorite people.

It seems like a lifetime ago.

https://web.archive.org/web/20090816212342/http://wrestlingupdateonline.com/blog/2009/08/11/happy-371st-birthday-old-man-the-roast-of-sheldon-goldberg/

Happy 371st Birthday, Old Man! The Roast of Sheldon Goldberg

By Casey Carnage
August 11, 2009
Many years ago, on this day, in a territory far, far away, Mom & Pop Goldberg welcomed a “human encyclopedia” into the world. I don’t suspect they knew it at the time, but I am positive they had high hopes for their 20 pound, 15 ½ oz. newborn boy (the head weighed 12 pounds, 10 pound and 3 ounces without the mustache). A doctor… A lawyer…whatever he was to become, I’m sure they just wanted him to be successful and happy at his choice…. that is until he decided on the performing arts. (Nine out of ten parents hate that.)
Somewhere along the road, the theater took the young man’s soul, and a desire to fail was born. The path to success to theater is bumpy, to say the least, yet their child was steadfast and was willing to take the journey so many fought for along the way with a penchant of wearing pink feathers in his Red Sox caps. By the courage of his convictions, he wrote a couple of plays that he produced to the stages. Unfortunately, they died faster than the actors could burn the scripts. Mr. Goldberg in leotards was a sight, though, many clamored to never see again. Did I mention he was a director/writer?
Along the way from his childhood, though, and after many attempts to join the Village People, professional wrestling was, at least, in the back of his mind. Professional Wrestling, you see, is the modern day “theater-in-the round”, meaning there is no obvious “fourth wall” (look it up on Wikipedia if you need more help the terminology).

Sheldon's Dream Job.

With wrestling through his heart, he partook in being writer and editor of “Mat Marketplace” (now, if I were to even act like I know what the hell that is, I would look like a bigger mark than I already may be. So to defend myself, I will say I don’t know). With this vehicle for his written word, the periodical, “World of Wrestling (WOW) (don’t blame me, I didn’t come up with the name) took notice and signed him up to write in its inaugural issue, and main feature, on, you guessed it, Bill Goldberg (no relation), the cool, snot-snorting former football player. This piece, although he never spoke to “the man who spit pyrotechnics” (it was the picture on the cover), stopped the space/time continuum in its tracks (not really). It also caught the attention of a couple of promoters (I doubt that too), Tony Rumble and Paul “The Check is in the Mail” Heyman.

Bill Goldberg after his pre-match meal of fireworks.

This motley crew set forth on bringing Japan’s Michinoku Pro to great success in the United States (if you are extremely lucky, video of their venture may be available on YouTube or eBay, but still highly unlikely).Unhappy with settling for obscurity, Heyman went back to focus on ECW, and the late Mr. Rumble (rest his soul) created a place for his promoting skills, New England-based Century Wrestling Alliance.
After the death of Mr. Rumble, Mr. Goldberg decided that his miring of obscurity and the lack of wrestling in the area was a combination to good to pass up. He decided to create and promote an obscure professional wrestling promotion, New England Championship Wrestling (NECW).

Have you seen this man? Public Enemy #1

(Now, before I go any further, I would like to say that none of his current or former employees will go on record stating a locker room meeting was held specifically where they voted that he not wear wrestling tights, although sources say such meeting did occur. This is also around the time the Mr. Goldberg became a full-fledged promoter, aka a dog… not a “dawg”, as in a cool, street-cred kind of way, but a “ruff, ruff” “flea-ridden” “scoundrel-of-the-earth” pooch.)

Police composite of Sheldon Goldberg.

As promoter, part-owner, and on-screen commissioner, Mr. Goldberg has worked his way around the Greater Boston area, selling his soul (no literal confirmation on this to date) to promote NECW, creating a place where wrestlers can turn to when there is nowhere else to go. Along this journey, he has used many media ventures to show how low some wrestlers sink to get work. One of these is NECW.tv website; a weekly show sent out over the internet, that, as far as I know, only women from Kansas watch while wearing ruby red slippers.

Must wear while viewing NECW.

Not to be stopped at just “webisodes”, and not happy with all the A&E reruns about wrestling days of lore when “kayfabe” meant something, Mr. Goldberg decided to further put himself over by creating the “Mouthpiece Wrestling Show”, played on Saturdays (ahem… pre-recorded) on 1510 AM “The Zone”, a show so dubious, none of the people he pays will even be on it (50,000 watts can’t make up for dignity). Although it may be the most listened to sports show in the Boston area, who listens to radio anymore? For that matter, the webcast version has a server made from rubber bands and bailing wires, hence crashes repeatedly (probably a contributor to the high ratings, and just the type of thing a wrestling promoter would pay for).
Nine years after in inception of wrestling’s epic failure, Mr. Goldberg has decided to add a new target for his “downward spiral of obscurity” on a national platform. On August 8^th, 2009, NECW (Mr. Goldberg is in the middle, and, trust me, it’s a good thing they didn’t show him from the waist down) announced that they will be shown on Comcast Sports Networks nationally, starting in early January (apparently the suicide rates around Christmas was too much for the company to compete with). Now we will all see his failures, making his momma proud!

NECW CSN Announcement

Success can be measured in many ways, and Mr. Goldberg is an example of what we should consider to be. Honestly, Sheldon Goldberg is a nice man (hell, he will even tell you that… ha!), and a very good friend, not only to myself, but to many in the Pro Wrestling community. One of a rare breed in a corner of the world considered lacking in moral fiber; he is a statue of what we should try to be. As I know I was roasting him, I consider this just as not meant to be as “factual”, and this is not truly meant to have ill intensions on anyone… even so much as I flubbed the timeline purposely, and is to be taken in jest; a “rib” on a man who I am honored to know, but truly blessed to have him as a friend, confidante, and mentor. Even though, I am positive that you, Sheldon, will not celebrate your day of birth, your mother should truly feel blessed that she has put on this earth a great, friendly person on this earth, and I hope that your future is full of many more great years.
Here are some links to know more about Sheldon Goldberg:

• NECW Wrestling
• Mouthpiece Wrestling Show
• NECW TV
• 1510 The Zone
• New_England_Championship_Wrestling on wikipedia
• Sheldon Goldberg Blogspot
• World Womens Wrestling

Sheldon Goldberg

–
Casey O.
aka Casey Carnage
Carnage Crew
Wrestlers Rescue

The Art Of The Deal

Ha!

Every agent has guidelines. They vary from agent to agent, but they stay relatively the same. As I've covered before, if you are a working, touring band, it is good for you to set your own guidelines within parameters so that buyers/promoters/venue owners, and your draw, don't get compromised.

I will also add that many agents are snakes, and what you will see below are things that, while booking, should help keep your from being lumped into that crowd.

These are some that I find important, because in booking, with reach and integrity, these guidelines will let your buyer know exactly what level of business you are within the business.

These will not assist you if you are a cover band or only have a local draw.

• Never renegotiate a deal - If you have already issued a contract, and it is signed and the deposit, pay, and parameters are agreed upon, you don't go back and renegotiate the deal. It is done. No band or agent should have to go back and try to add extra rooms, better pay, etc. The deal is done once the venue, agent, and artist have agreed. If things pop up, as they tend to, you handle them, but usually it isn't the venues job to do so. IF YOU ARE AN ARTIST AND YOU ASK AN AGENT TO BOOK YOU ON SHOWS THAT HAVE ALREADY BEEN ANNOUNCED, YOU WILL NOT BE ON THE BILL. If that person was your agent, they would've tried to add you to the bill if it made sense. If the person is not your agent, they have no interest in adding you and will not jeopardize their shows to add you. Don't bother the buyers either. They have already planned on who would have those spots. It just isn't worth it.
• 60/60 - There are variances here, but mine means 60 miles for 60 days. The venue may ask for what works with them, and that is okay, but it good to have your own set of parameters. Some agents use 30/30, 90/90, etc., but be mindful how that can effect your future bookings. There are instances where this may not come into play, like when routing to festivals or the venues are willing to work together, but don't assume they will. You need to ask. It just isn't worth it.
• Communication - There is no way I can promote this enough. I have seen agents not tell artists, band representation, or venues something that very pertinent to booked dates. Be honest even if it is painful, because if you are booking for one commision, you could lose many by not being honest. If an offer is coming in below your financial threshold, let the artist know. let the buyer know as well that it may not be approved (agents NEVER approve a booking; the artist does).I have seen many bands and agents burn a buyer by not being honest, and I have seen buyers put bands in bad situations by not being honest with them. If you are a band member who books for the band, be honest with them about everything. Rule of thumb: if a band member doesn't care about the business side, remove them. They are not professional, and will end up wasting your time. It just isn't worth it.
• Never have too many cooks in the kitchen - Because you have to use so much communication, you don't need too many people trying to book over each other. As a band, you think it helps you, but actually it hurts you. Too many people trying to book the same band in one venue not only makes your outfit look disorganized, you will get less money because your agents are actually booking against each other. Anyone you have booking should be in constant contact with each other. If you were just acting like a puppet master and to coordinate every thing without letting them communicate, I will tell you from my experience that I will no longer book you. It just isn't worth it.
• Know your clients worth in a venue or area - Trying to overprice a band that doesn't have a strong draw or pull in an area will hurt all concerned. Artists want more. Buyers want to save more. Look for the compromise. If either won't bend, just simply move on. It just isn't worth it.
• Never negotiate too long - Look, some of these things can take weeks to get together. Buyers may want to think it over, the artist has certain demands, and things of that nature. If, however, you are haggling over a price with someone because they are trying to save money and you can't put your band in that level of a compromising position, move on. This isn't a swap meet. There is a reason the price is in the neighborhood it is in, and you don't have to explain it to the buyer, but the buyer has to realize this. A band wants to play, but would rather stay home than play for an amount that wouldn't even cover their expenses. Also, while you're on the phone with this person for hours upon weeks, they are keeping you from shopping elsewhere, It becomes a giant waste of time. It just isn't worth it.

Here are some things your agent can not approve in a negotiation (but can suggest to a buyer whether it would work or not):

• Hotel rooms
• Hospitality Rider
• Technical Rider
• Support Acts (This, however, is different if the bands are on tour together or not)
• Any actual VIP procedures 

This is a very short synopsis of what an agent (or a band representative who handles the booking) should look at, and I am sure I will be updating this at some point, so keep your eyes peeled.

Even if you aren't booking but have someone do it for you, know that these shows take time to make them work out right. I promise if you try to rush or push me, I will just drop it and/or you. It just isn't worth it.

Until we meet again....

Happine$$...

I took this picture a few years ago, and the image signifies to me that while I am heading to the sunset, the view is beautiful.

A while back, I went through a series of events that, had they been by themselves, would have been tragic but manageable. Together, I felt like my life was coming to a head. To say I was (and still to some extent) a little depressed is an understatement. My entire world was crashing around me and there was nowhere to turn without feeling like I jeopardized those close to me like I was the second coming of the Black Plague. The negativity I felt was tremendous, and as a recovering alcoholic, I heard my old friend calling for me to come home. The struggle was real. Little did I realize at the time, my life missed any true direction as I constantly just went with the flow and hoped for the best.

I knew at that point my friend had to wait while I looked for the positive in the situation.

The positive I found in this was at my age, I had a free pass with nothing holding me back from doing what I truly wanted. That was the catch. What did I want?

After asking myself, I realized I just wanted to be happy.

I have had people ask me what that meant. They would tell me of their dreams of a new car, better living conditions, new job, etc. Things were what would make them happy. I, myself, consider these to be secondary things, as while they are vital to the populous concept of success, they are secondary to what truly matters,

While I understand this somewhat, I can't completely grasp this concept.

I'm of the philosophy that you can have nothing and be happy or can have everything and be miserable. You can have things, but there is no guarantee of happiness with them. I understand the quality of life is higher, but there is the saying "more money, more problems", so this can be a catch-22.

To me, happiness is a state of mind. It's about being surrounded by what you care about and what cares about you. In life, stuff comes and goes: instances, possessions, and even people. Those people, however, that fit with your crazy is who should have around you. This matters to me.

I want my world to continuously have those instances; perpetual serenity, knowing that no matter how hard it can be, it will never be as hard as it has been. I don't expect it to be perfect, but that it is relatively manageable.

I don't expect to have the ability to change the world, but I do expect to be able to change my world. I want those in that world to share in my happiness, knowing that we benefit from knowing each other because there is a connection beyond the secondary things in life.

I fully expect to be happy, but I know there has been, and will be, many bumps in the road along the way, but the one thing I am certain of is I am finally headed in the right direction.

Until we meet again...

Orange Star High CD Review

Who: Orange Star High

Facebook  Instagram  Email  Twitter  Official Website YouTube

What: Self-titled 5 song EP

When: Available as of April 1st, 2017

Where: Available on iTunes & Spotify; Merchandise is available

Cast:

Wil Whaley - Lead Vocals

Justin Velte - Lead Guitar/Vocals
Brady Whaley - Guitar/Vocals
Matthew Velte - Bass/Vocals
Lael Milum - Drums/Vocals

In A Word:  Coherent

Reminds Me Of: A more commercial, punk version of Avenged Sevenfold. Think their debut CD.

The Songs:

1. Number 1 (Hot Thespian Action) - This is the single. The first thing I heard from OSH months ago, and fell in love with it. Covered in hooks, the lead off track lets you know what these guys are going for musically. Matthew's jazz inspired bass lines create the perfect back drop for Wil's vocal inflections while setting the stage for the very oriental guitar melody. The chorus is even catchier as the lyrics say what we've all felt at one time or another. With Megadeth-type transitions, the bouncy groove tells you  these guys know their styles. I can visualize this on a very big stage.
2. Coming Down - This was released as the second single, I didn't really love this as first, but the more I listened to this, the more I like it. This song would not be lost in the shuffle of mainstream radio with its melodic chorus, raging bridge, and discordant verses. This song has a very "live" feel to it that allows space for the crowd to sing along. Justin's melodic lead passages and crunchy rhythms make him the MVP of this track, as he shows he can shred, but doesn't always have to to get his point across musically.
3. Anti-Love - The track has a very punchy rhythm that opens up to a catchy chorus, Wil's rebellious delivery drives this track with his snotty, "fuck you" attitude and unbridled passion. Wil is the type of singer I like, and this number proves it, that he sounds like he can't sing, but he really can and it really sneaks up on the listener as he focuses on inflecting the attitude, but creeps vocal melody in on you when you don't expect it. Lael's drumming stands out as well. The style runs the gamut of various rhythms and he syncs up with each turn perfectly, staying within the song, and creating a foundation for the rest of the band to follow along to.
4. Tearing Your Heart Out - This is a current favorite track of mine as it is an easy track to get lost in. I hear Neil Peart in Lael's drums, and any fan of the progressive, legendary band will dig the drive of this song. Think "Power Punk Rush", with Randy Rhoads type of tone for the rhythm guitars. The harmony guitars make this song separate itself from their peers of the same genre. Again, Matthew's bass lines are all over the place, but always in the right place at the right time, and with Lael and Matthew together, drives this song to where you think at anytime it could fall apart, but never does.
5. Brighter Side - The Avenged Sevenfold influence is very obvious on this track from the very first note through the last chorus with it's hybrid of punk attitude and thrashy musical interplay. The harmonies on this track really stand out here more than the other tracks, which is no small feat in and of itself. Justin takes a true moment to shine during the very choir-like guitar solo, letting his hair down (no pun intended) to show the listener what he can do when he wants to rip your face off. The rhythms of this song also invoke images of mosh pits, dollar beers, and many stage dives. It is like the band decided this was the last track to remind you they will tickle your ears while kicking your ass.

The Production: With the exception of a guitar edit on the track "Tearing My Heart Out" and some very minor mastering issues, the production on this EP is very stellar, not just for an independent band, but for many national acts as well. Sonically, you feel every kick drum, and bass line groove, while clearly hearing EVERY guitar line while never compromising any lead or backing vocal. This production was done with a plan, and if that plan wasn't achieved, it didn't miss by much. Many bands should be so lucky to have this kind of production on ANY of their releases, let alone their very first offering.

What Needs To Happen: I don't know the inner workings of a genre like this and it's lifespan, but the music is catchy enough, I don't think it can compromise the band's potential in the market sonically. I would suggest "dumbing down" some of the upcoming tracks for the next release so the musicianship is not lost on the casual listener. As the saying goes: "Keep it simple, stupid.". It also wouldn't hurt to slow down a little bit to let the listener breathe and take everything going on in and process it. This isn't to suggest the band has too much going on, but to keep the listener engaged,and not exhausted after a few spins. The trick is to not think on your level, but to think on their level, and to not get lost going over the listener's head.

The next thing is a big deal many bands dismiss, and OSH is not exception; image. I am going to take some liberties here to point out what is wrong. Look like a band. Look like four guys who actually share a style, think the same things, and run in the same social circles. Record companies look at this type of thing and visualize what you look like on a flyer. This also is a non-musical way of letting people know where you are coming from to engage them into listening to your music. If every guy looks different, the potential listener isn't able to get a grasp before listening and will assume it is a mess. It IS your first impression.

Conclusion: I am not supposed to like this, but I'm not supposed to do many things I have done. This is not the genre I typically work in (although I listen to some often), but has enough familiarity in it that I feel very comfortable in my critique of their work. THIS IS VERY GOOD AND I SUGGEST SEEKING THIS OUT AND GIVING IT A LISTEN OR TEN. This is a very coherent EP where the songs are not only good, but make sense with each other with depth while not sounding redundant or contrived.

This is also the type of thing other bands will be jealous of. Two things: 1) shut the fuck up, and 2) get to work. These guys had a clear vision, put in the work, and got the kind of results that would make anyone proud. This is who sits at the cool kids table in the cafeteria.

Final Grade: B+ with extra credit can make it an A-. Loads of potential, and I feel this best is yet to come, and I'm ready to go along for the ride.

Until we meet again...

Orange Star High

One of the better new bands I have heard in a while:

https://www.facebook.com/OrangeStarHigh/?fref=nf

So you want to be a rock star...

Almost every musician has dreams of hitting the "big time" with their art/craft, yet so many have no clue how to accomplish this feat. I find many times, they think they know (they should be protective of their careers), but I liken it to someone who can hardly navigate their Facebook telling an IT person how to fix their computer or a person who can't change a flat tire telling a mechanic how to rebuild an engine.

Recently, I wrote this detailing some of the many common mistakes artists make on their journey down the path of mythical musical riches. 

Take a second to refresh yourself with the article.

Are you back yet? Good. Let's get one thing out of the way now.

The years of making millions of dollars in music is virtually unheard of now. Record companies don't throw out as much money as they used to at unproven acts. You won't get rich in this business, but you can make a living if you actually work hard at it. 

Here are so easy tips that many bands just seem to miss for one reason or another:

• Get an EPK (Electronic Press Kit). It should contain your logo, a song or two, a couple of choice photos, a small biography, contact information, and links to live reviews or press clippings if you have any. No one wants to read your life story except maybe your mother, or see every picture of your band puking drunk. Get used to work with press to promote your band locally and nationally. Also, be mindful that the EPK service you use doesn't bludgeon visitors about getting their app. If you can't draw locally, don't expect to draw nationally. If you don't draw, enjoy your ramen cuisine.
• Do original music. Every town has 100 cover bands who can draw, so your cover band is not really all that special. "Write is right". If you don't write, enjoy your ramen cuisine.
• Look like a band. Believe it or not, most bands don't make it past the eye test. Your band image actually tells people whether your band looks like they are on the same page or not, or if they aren't worth the time. Also, no matter your image, make sure you don't look like you just got off work from Gamestop. If you don't think image is important, don't work on it and enjoy your ramen cuisine.
• Work on your hooks. Just because you have the ability to play music does mean you have talent or can draw. Charisma helps, but your music must have hooks and be catchy within your genre. If you're afraid that may be too cheesy for you, enjoy your ramen cuisine.
• Bring your music to the people. NEVER, EVER ask people to search for your stuff when they ask you for links. I can promise you they don't care about your music as much as you do, and will get lost in the shuffle. If a promoter, agent, or club owner asks you for an EPK and a link, and you tell them to "google it", you will be enjoying your ramen cuisine.
• Use professional equipment. Many bands are actually very lost on this one. This doesn't just mean Peavey and Crate aren't good enough, but that your Line 6 amp or your drummer's exact replica of Neil Peart's 2112 drum set is too good. There is a standard backline most professional bands use, and your band should too. This not only makes it easy to switch in and out, but will actually help you get opening slots for bigger acts coming through the area without you having to sell tickets, which means greater exposure and networking. Here are some riders to help, but remember the size of the venue you are playing, so two quality Marshall half stacks, and Ampeg bass rig, and I steardy five piece drumset (one rack tom, two floor toms) is very standard. If your band doesn't have good equipment, eat your fine ramen cuisine and save up.
• Keep your party in check. If it is your show, you are the master-of-ceremonies, and you need to make sure people are having a good time, but you and your bandmates need to keep your partying in check. This, no matter how you want to look at it, is still a job, albeit not as strict, but every action is monitored by everyone around you and your band. Act like you know what you're doing and keep control, or enjoy eating your ramen cuisine.

There is so much more than these, but these are some of the very basic needs bands seem to overlook. You have to realize you will have to invest in your craft to go beyond the practice room, but I have seen bands waste hundreds and thousands of dollars on inferior results, usually due to poor direction or thinking they actually know what they are doing. 

Don't be that waste.

The video below is Billy.

Billy is a profesional musician.

Billy has his shit together.

Billy has toured with several bands.

Billy makes a sustainable living in music.

Don't be a dumbass.

Be like Billy.

Billy

Billy

Until we meet again...